End of Day

The only productive thing I did all day was the dishes just now. At least they're done. I'm supposed to go to my cousin's bridal shower in Va tomorrow with my mom and sister, but I'm not sure if it's going to happen. For one, I've been sick to my stomach all day today and for two, the kids have not been behaving well at all and I'm not sure I want to leave them for Bob to deal with (semi)alone. Marti, Dawn and Kiki have all made their availability known, but it's not me. A day away would be really nice, I'm just not sure I want it to be 3 1/2 hours away. Even if I do take Liam.
My shoulder is hurting again too. It had mostly stopped on Thursday, but yesterday it was worse again and right now it's getting to the nauseating stage. I really hate being in pain all the time. I found some more new bruises as well (origin unknown, as usual).
I love this house. I really don't want to leave it. I just feel like there are some major cons that go along with it - for the people we are. If Joe Gardener wanted it, he'd love it, as long as he didn't have allergies or joint problems. I guess the two main things on the top of the list now are central air and small yard/driveway. When the kids get older, one set of stairs won't be so bad, I guess. Although I'd really like to have the one story living if it's at all possible. I keep thinking that we'll get a break during the yard sale... guess we'll see if it's wishful thinking.

Quick Post (probably)

Thursday we spent all day at Lake Tobias. Friday we spent all day doing nothing. Today I slept until an hour ago.
I'm really worried about Molly. I'm worried about her tendency to violence. I'm worried about her lack of caring about her behavior. I'm worried that her pride gets in the way of truth and communication (and just about everything else). I don't know how to reach her and I'm afraid I'm losing her. All this at the ripe old age of 5. Maybe I need a reality check, maybe it's not so bad. I just don't know anymore.

Chores

The laundry is at least sorted and the nasty stuff is in the washer. And I stripped my bed as well, which has needed to be done...
The basement is a disaster, but I really will need a vicodin before I can clean it up. The advil from this morning has most definitely worn off (with what little good it did). I'd like to get the whole basement picked up and vacuumed and then set up all the tents and tunnels and things for the girls to play in. They haven't had them out for a while, so maybe it would keep them busy. Right now they're watching "Dora saves the Mermaids". Gag! Lol.
Lorelei keeps on coming in here fussing because she's hurt herself in some way or another. Just now it was because she stepped on something. Then, trying to get into my lap, she banged her face on my computer desk. If it's not one thing, it's another!!
I should do pictures. I got the reunion ones sorted, but I still have the zoo trip to do before I can put them online. ttfn!

Drugs

I think I'll take a vicodin today just so that doing laundry is more enjoyable. And so falls another desperate housewife. Lol! :)
My kids are dancing around to Shania Twain at the moment.
I took three advil this morning and a hot shower that took the edge off, but I can tell it's starting to wear off already.
I HAVE to do laundry today, though, I don't have anymore underwear. It would be nice to mop the dining room as well, since your feet kinda stick as you walk along...
Is it bad that if I could do anything in the world it would be to sleep?
I'm back - I took a time out to make the bunch of birds in the field out back fly away so the kids could watch.
Lorelei is a true music lover, I think. Although her favorites are things with a beat - probably techno is at the top. You should see her in the car when we put it on - she goes into this trance and bangs her head against the back of her car seat.
Lorelei decided she wanted me to hold her and it's impossible to type, so ttfn!

Cliches

They talk about pain being a crippling thing or bringing you to your knees and, as always, cliches have at least a grain of truth in them, but in this instance I find them to be quite literal. My shoulder hurts so bad sometimes it makes my knees buckle. I can't explain it. I gave in a took a vicodin when Bob came home from work this afternoon. It was the nicest 3 hours I've had in a while. The pain was only actually gone for 1, but I didn't care for the 2 hours surrounding that one. I hate taking pain killers that strong, since they affect my mind as well, but the pain was nauseating. I have a really hard time coming to grips with this being the way the rest of my life will be.

Pity

As much as I hate being in pain and sometimes need help, or need to rest, I hate pity from people. Life is what it is. I'm dealing with what I've been dealt and I don't need pity! (Especially from people who crave it themselves.) If I say I can (or want) to do something, despite (or maybe because of) how I'm feeling, take my word for it, please! Don't second guess my own judgement about my own life. The last thing I want is to be treated like an invalid.

Oh Crappy Day

When Lorelei's in a good mood she sings "Oh happy day" over and over and over again. I'm writing a new song... "Oh crappy day, when children wash my will to live away". (Btw, for those of you who don't know, a bit of a disclaimer, when I'm in pain and in a bad mood I can tend to bit dramatic...)

Crap

So I finally get a day when I feel like there's nothing pressing on the calendar and it's going to be a crappy day. The kids are not doing well - whether it's because they don't feel good or they're not getting enough sleep, I don't know, but they've been really whiny for the past few days and it just seems to be getting worse.
I am in so much pain it's hard to function. I wish I knew what causes my muscles to just seize up the way they do.
To top it all off, I should really spend my day in the basement, doing laundry, of course. I haven't done laundry in a very long time and we're running out of clothes. I really don't feel like doing anything today, much less that, but I guess I will have to endure the whining and crying and just do it.
We looked at another house last night, but it's a no go. It was a really nice house, especially for what they had it listed for, but they only had 3 bedrooms on the first floor and the laundry was in the garage. So it wouldn't solve two of the more important issues we have with this house. Somewhere out there, there has to be a house that would make it so that I wouldn't have to go up or down stairs for normal living - one that doesn't cost a ridiculous amount of money. Maybe I should just let Bob put the washer and dryer up here... It would look horrible but I'd probably get it done on a more regular basis. I hardly ever go in the basement now.
In other news, I'm WAY behind on pictures. I told one of my dad's cousins that I'd have the pics of the reunion up last Tuesday. Right.
Well, Lorelei is screaming her head off about things unknown, so I should at least put her in the basement so Kiki can sleep.
ttfn.