While I'm waiting for the kids to go to sleep...

I've been thinking about the level of revelation in this blog. I'm pretty much a brain dump kind of journalist turned blogger. I've been journaling since I was about 14 and I have books and books filled with random thoughts and diatribes, but the one thing that stays the same is that what comes to mind goes on the page. But, is that too much information? I'm not sure I can consider this a completely personal journal since anyone can read it. I'm not really one that considers a whole lot of things as personal, but do other people really want to know? I'm sure most of what I'd have to say is harmless, but I wouldn't want the unwary reader to stumble upon something and think "Ohmygods! I didn't want to know that!" nor would I want people to read (or not read) feeling like they have to be careful or something. From my point of view, I don't really care what people want to tell me, especially in a journal or email. The more open the better, in my opinion, and if something makes me uncomfortable I'll say so, though usually not in so many words. So I guess, if you want to comment about it, let me know your opinion! :)
Right now I would really like to go downstairs and watch Bridget Jones's Diary with my sister, but I can't because Lorelei is fussing about going to sleep. This has become more and more of an issue lately and I can't really figure out how to make it go away. For the most part, when it comes to her naps, I'll give her a bottle, put her in bed and she'll eventually go to sleep with little or no crying. But at night, if she's not asleep when you put her in bed she'll whine and cry and eventually get so worked up she'll throw up. Sometimes she'll be awake until 9:30 at night and that's way too late considering she doesn't really sleep in in the morning. She's pretty consistently the first one awake (although I'm not sure about Molly since she's an early riser, but she'll stay in her bed and read and I don't even know she's awake). Anyway, I'm not sure I really believe in the whole "cry it out" method. We did that with Molly and it seems to have created a lot of mistrust and anger. We didn't do the cry it out with Maggie because she would throw up eventually and I just didn't want to deal with that. Plus, after our experiences with Molly, I didn't want to do the same thing to another kid. Maggie was a completely different personality, though, too, and she didn't really give us all the trouble Molly did. Lorelei's personality is more like Molly's than Maggie's, although she seems to be sensitive to discipline in a way that Molly never was. I'd hate to put her to bed and not go in no matter what when she's sobbing her heart out because she just wants to be cuddled. But I feel like we can't keep rocking her for hours on end until she falls asleep. Nor can we let her stay up until she's falling asleep on her feet. So what do I do? Right now she's in her crib with her aquarium on, but she crying and saying "Daddy" and "Kitty" and other babble - obviously pleas for someone to come in. She's not crying inconsolably - she'll stop the instant I walk in there - but I still don't like to hear it. And I feel like I can't go about my business with her crying like that - especially watching a movie. I'm not one that can walk away and turn off the monitor and not know what's going on. That just seems wrong to me. What if she did throw up? Am I to leave her up there to fall asleep in her puke? Sorry, can't do that. So I'm sitting her blogging, listening to her crying, knowing eventually I'll go in there and rock her to sleep. She'll be 17 months old tomorrow and she's still not sleep trained. She even wakes up at least once a night. Sometimes up to 3 times a night! But I cannot just let her cry, so I guess I shouldn't complain.
Molly and Maggie are a completely different issue. They were fine (for the most part) until they started sharing a room. Now they too are up until 9:30ish either talking or fighting. Maggie has always had the ability to sleep in, Molly never has. She used to wake Maggie up first thing in the morning, but we finally broke that habit. The thing is, they still aren't getting enough sleep. Maggie is only 3 and she should take a nap, but she flat out refuses. Even if I make her go to her room and lay in her bed, she will lay there and not sleep. I know she gets tired in the afternoon, you can see it in her face and she cries about everything, and yet, she will not take a nap. She would fall asleep a lot sooner if Molly weren't in the room. Even if Molly isn't antagonizing her, for some reason she just stays up until she falls asleep by accident. The whole issue doesn't seem to affect Molly as much as it used to, but I can tell she's still tired in the morning and throughout the day. What is the big deal with kids and sleep? I LOVE to sleep!
Lorelei is calling for Molly now. Molly is her back up Mommy. When I'm not around, or busy with Liam or she's mad at me, she goes to Molly.
I've already been in with Lorelei once, although I just lay her down and told her to go to sleep. That usually makes her cry harder. She's starting to get pretty upset now, although there are still breaks in her crying. I've read all the books and they say if there are breaks in their crying then they're not really that upset.
Lorelei has always been a cranky kid. I "wore" her in a sling for the first 9 months until I was too big with Liam to do it anymore. She's always been happier while being held. I mean, I guess all kids are to a certain extent, but she just seems to be a little extreme. We've tried everything with her and at every milestone we think, maybe this will be the thing that changes her from cranky to content! It never does! Even now, she's learning to talk better, I think "Maybe once she can communicate, she'll stop whining so much!" No dice, so far. She's getting teeth in, so I know she's uncomfortable, but Tylenol seems to make her puke sometimes. I hate it when my kids puke! I just don't know what else to do than to sit in there and rock her until she falls asleep.
Usually at night when she wakes up, we'll go in with a bottle and put her down as soon as she's done drinking it and she just goes right back to sleep. Sometimes we have to rock her. All I can say is, I'll be really glad when she's sleeping through the night consistently. She has done it before, but not many nights in a row (any nights in a row?). By the time Molly was 4 or 5 months old she was sleeping through the night (and going to bed without fussing). Maggie got up at 3 am to nurse every night until she was 20 months old, but she went to sleep without fussing and went back to sleep after that feeding without fussing, so it didn't seem like that big a deal. Liam already goes to sleep without fussing and only gets up once or twice a night to eat.
The thing is, Lorelei used to go to bed without a problem. I'm not really sure when it started being an issue, I've just noticed it a lot lately. Maybe because Liam's not on the same schedule as everyone else at night. When he was staying up until 9 or 10 it didn't register quite as loudly, but now that he's going to sleep around 6, Lorelei is a definite issue.
Bob is mowing tonight too, so I have to deal with it all by myself, which really sucks, because normally we'll switch off, or if I'm doing something else, he'll just deal with it by himself.
We haven't started spanking Lorelei for anything yet. I'll swat her butt with my hand if I want her to listen and she's not, but it's not enough to hurt and it gets results. I don't think she'd understand a spanking because she's crying instead of going to sleep. I know she's not afraid to be in her room alone - she'll often wake up from a nap and play before she calls me to get her. She's played at night instead of crying before too... tarnation!
Guess I'll check my email while I wait longer...